The Happening

So if you have not seen it, do not read any further. Mind you, it is bleeding obvious, so feel free to read on.
I managed to get to this latest M Night Shayamalan piccy without knowing much, which was hard given my daily trawl through horror websites. I guess I quite liked it, but during the following week I heard so many bad things about it I feel my opinion has been derailed. Back on trak, Zooey Deschanel should be banned from acting, as she looks crazy for most of the film. Yes, I have thought about director guidance, but I go with her bad skills.
Mark Wahlberg on the other hand, I am not so sure about. He acts like a simpleton (being a devout christian (him not me) I can believe it). I am not sure he is the best choice as a science teacher, as he seems a bit parrot-like when performing some of his lines.
At the end of the movie, all I wanted to do was rush home and hug my family.
The fact that I didn't is a fact of family life (I had to go to Tesco), but once home I was chuffed.

Lady not dead in the water

Now I know this has been out for a while now, but what with babies, job, crazy Yakuza films to watch, I have not got round to it. Any how, a recovery day from work gave me the opportunity to take in this M. Night Shyamalan joint after a small amount of persuasion with Mrs Mick.
Trepidation filled my bones, as I had heard a lot of bad comments about this addition to the MNS oeuvre. I need not have feared however, as Mr Indian pulled another monster out of the closet. I guess if you would not buy into the whole "fairy-tale" scenario then the film would be problematic. But hey, I am hard to please, just not a fanboy-with-a-stick-up-my-arse. The film moved me, engaged me, made me cry (not too hard to do), put my hackles up, and generally did everything a good movie should.
Given the negative stuff I had heard from various podcasts, and read through various genre publications, I was almost overwhelmed by the whole experience.
I think I am probably a fan of Mr Shyamalan, having liked Sixth Sense, liked Unbreakable, almost loved Signs (apart form the Gibson factor), and really quite liked The Village, but headed in to this viewing with fear in my heart. Stuff the nay-sayers I say.
I am off to see The Happening tomorrow with a bit of luck and child good behaviour.
I can't wait.

Hit me with your rhythm stick. And your walking stick. And your car. And your hand grenade. Ooh, and lets make sure with a nuke!

Bloody hell, I'm glad I have not seen Crash. Well the Paul Haggis version anyhow. Just watched In the Valley of Elah and yes, it was well written well directed and all that cobblers, but bloody hell, talk about beat you senseless with the main point. War is hell, blah-blah, it makes devils of us all, blah-blah, when we return we are still devils, blah-blah.
Ooh, look at all these evil phone videos. Ooh, lets make the culprit blank-faced with PTSD. Ooh, lets put this flag upside-down. Ooh just in case anybody didn't get it, lets dedicate it to the children.
Perhaps if more Americans dedicated their lives to not shooting children in their own country, the world would be a better place. But God probably told them to shoot the suckers.
It all comes back to the fact that even post 9-11, more Americans have been killed by their own kind than by terrorists. Go figure. Or as Paul Haggis would say:
Bam! with a fist!
Bam! with a stick!
Bam!! with a knife!!
Bam!!! with a gun!!!

On a more parochial note, at least Donny got promoted today!!

Blinded by the (evangelical) light.

I chuffing hate evangelical Yanks.
On a completely separate topic, I recently watched another fantastic documentary from Errol Morris. The Fog of War "stars" Robert McNamara, a former Secretary of Defense (sic) talking about his life and experiences in the diplomatic big-brain corps. He has eleven lessons that he has learnt, and which he feels we could all benefit from by using his experience. I think he is pretty much right really. The film is one of Morris's "let them talk but add a bit of archive footage" jobs which I prefer, as his earlier stuff like Vernon, Florida and Gates of Heaven left me a bit cold, with just the odd character standing out as worth watching.
The subjects discussed seem highly topical given the fact that Iraq is having the crap blown out of it and the USA (with the UK as it's lapdog) seems to be lining up Iran. Lessons obviously not learned. It beggars belief that the USA can once again see the only way forward for a slightly misguided bit of the world being to embrace free-enterprise and the dubious benefits of consumerism. Don't get me wrong, I love buying stuff as much as the next bloke (have you seen my on-line DVD catalogue?), but not everybody in the world has to sign up to the shallow vacuous existence promoted by American TV (and the Administration, to keep the rednecks in check).
Line up at the doors of the out-of-town shopping mall to buy your plastic effigies of Jesus nailed to the cross.
I chuffing hate evangelical Yanks.

I'm nearly back! (like you cared)

I know it has been nearly a month, but I have been writing stuff, just in my log book, not up here. I have seen a stack of stuff, so expect an avalanche at the first sign of work going slack.

Barbie-licious

A crazy 70's sub Charlie's Angels, secret-agent mix, The Doll Squad is a colourful cheeseball with poor dialogue, acting, sets and plot. Lots of semi-naked "beauties" with heaving bosoms toting big machine guns, chopping and kicking their way through dozens of men. It tries, but never quite gets to any state of respectability, but is nevertheless good for a chuckle. There is a lot of blood and thunder and quite callous cruelty which surprised me a bit.
Pretty thin James Bond style plot - evil megalomaniac wants to take over the world then spills the beans in time for our heroes to save the day. Wonderfully dodgy special effects (the same explosion is repeatedly shown throughout the film, just coloured differently or flipped around.
The most convincing member of the cast is Tura Satana, mainly due to her martial arts expertise (have I just made that up?), so you get the deal here.

Yum-yum

A hard to find Canadian production (I got it from eBay), Blood & Donuts is a small, character-driven horror-based film that was a refreshing change from the previous day's Horton debacle.
A vampire is woken from a 25 year sleep by a stray golf ball hit from a rooftop. He was sleeping to try and get away from the complexities of co-existing with the humans about him, but he seems to decide to give it another go. It is not really a vampire-flick, just an awkward outsider trying to fit in style job. From that point of view it is pretty good, with the vampire trying to resist his addiction (to blood, dummy) and using his powers (super-strength, big scary vampire face) to help his new-found friends. Fine performances from Currie and Clarkson as the romantic leads offset by a bizarre accents from his cabbie friend which takes you out of the moment every time he is in a scene. Sinister cameo from big Dave Cronenberg is great, the best of his I have seen.
Overall, a gentle (apart from the blood!), easy watch.

You what?

My daughter's birthday, so as a treat before the unleashing of the cake we had a trip to the flicks to see Horton hears a Who. Like father, like daughter, neither of us liked it much. It follows the book pretty much, but sticks in a load of back story and waffle that just seems to take away it's best points. The animation was OK, but bits of hyper-realism (the opening shot of water drops for instance) jarred with the Dr Seuss style characters. Some good jokes-monkeys as banana machine guns, the animé-style insert (but why was it there? Just thrown in for filler?). Jim Carey quickly grates with his usual gurning and OTT voice not even hidden by his being an elephant.
It was rated as U, but a couple of scenes had several children leaping into their parent's laps in fear.
Not an ideal start to a four year old's birthday, or any day for that matter.

Wet, wet, wet

Not sure I got the point of this one, but it kept coming up in stuff I have read, so thought I would give it a try. The Witch who came from the sea is typical early 70's exploitation fayre. The story of the gradual disintegration of a young woman's mind brought on by abuse as a child. She desires young muscle-mens bodies, but then wants to chop off their privates. We've all been there eh? Just me then? OK.
She eventually (quite quickly actually) goes on a killing spree (or does she?), falls apart and has an assisted suicide. I wasn't sure that she actually did the acts of violence in the early parts of the film, but the later sections imply that she did. Perhaps I wasn't paying attention. She gets a pretty good mermaid tattoo on her belly (just like her abusive Dad's) that I am pretty sure my wife would approve of, especially given the amount of Miami Ink she has been watching recently.
A much-lauded central performance form Millie Perkins, I found it to be overblown and bland in equal measure (perhaps I really wasn't paying attention).
The movie was on the Video Nasty list over here in the UK, but who knows why? Bloody Thatcherism gone mad again, as there is no real on-screen gore. It is pretty sure what she is up to, but you never actually see the razor slicing into flesh.
To me it was neither exploitation nor art house, just a bit of a damp squib.

I didn't ask you to come here...

On the recommendation of the Horror Etc podcast I "obtained" the 1944 movie The Uninvited starring Ray Miland. It was alleged to be an atmospheric ghost story. To be fair to it, 1944 was a long time ago, but I always try to take that into account when viewing older films. There is not much point in comparing stuff like this to say, Ring, although to be honest it probably would have had a similar effect on audiences of the time.
A typical (of the time) "stagey" piece, with formal acting, but the atmospheric black and white cinematography, and pretty good ghost special effects negate the stiffness to a good degree. The story is twisty-turny, but nothing that I have not seen many times in later (and some earlier) films. To some degree the epilogue spoils the tense finish, but nicey-nice endings were all the rage. Perhaps life was much simpler then.
Worth a watch, but only if you can forgive its period formalities.

I'm a Yankee Doodle Gangster

Finally got round to watching the marathon crime drama that is "American Gangster" by the hot/cold Ridley Scott. The start had me confused a bit as the time period was difficult (for me) to pin-down, due to the fashions I guess. It soon got into it's stride and fairly cracked along considering it has a 2h45m running time.
A pretty standard straight cop fighting corruption/crime boss building an empire story, except it is based on truth. Well sort of truth (according to Wikipedia). OK, very little truth and a load of made up bollocks by the sound of it.
Still, as a movie it was gripping, stylish (to be expected from Rid) and had my buttocks clenched with the tension in the final act.
The epilogue (always reminds me of "Streets of San Francisco" when I see that word) seemed a bit tacked on and took me out of the story a bit.
Still, well worth a watch.
7/10

What a swell party

And a great host! Oooh, bad pun. But up to my usual standard.
I recently watched "The Host" ("Gwoemul" in Korea) with my eight month old son. Well he slept through most of it actually. If only he knew what he had missed.
The film starts with the creation of a toxic soup which allows a mutant fish/amphibian type thing to develop. It then moves to a scenario that seems to appear in many Korean/Asian films - a typical family set-up. Well perhaps not typical as they seem to live in a kiosk in the banks of the Han river in Seoul. But they seem happy enough.
The happiness is soon shattered when the greatly-increased-in-size animal appears and begins to chomp through the customers. It all goes pear-shaped from there on in, with dolops of Korean slapstick, pathos, anti-establishment sentiment and death. I cried, but then I always do. Cuddling sonny-boy for the duration didn't help like.
The CGI creature is pretty good considering the budget and the fact I am still not convinced by much of the use that CGI has been put to.
I'm pretty sure there is a great political sub-text in the film, but not being up on the history of South Korea I couldn't tell you what it is. They don't seem too keen on the Yanks much anyhow.
I didn't find it scary as such, but there were good periods of tension. It was pretty funny, with the aforementioned slapstick adding the (seemingly necessary in nearly all Japanese/Korean films I have seen) light relief.

Best thing I have seen for a while, 8/10

Mad? I was bloody furious!

Just watched the first episode of Mad Men. Heidi didn't like it, neither did I until the final 10-15 minutes, where I saw a little bit of complexity appearing. It's not like I am asking for the world! I think the misogyny might put me of, but I will try another episode. Then again, I never got into The Sopranos so perhaps the screenwriter doesn't appeal to me. 5/10

Ah-ha! The third secret!

So I am back. No reason for being away, just nowt to report.
This week I have mostly been watching The Third Secret. A little film from 1964 (two years before I was born) about mental illness. Kimberly Lindbergs from Cinebeats put me onto this. I'm not sure where she found it, but her nose is highly tuned for off-target sixties cinema.
Well, I am very surprised not to have come across this before, as it is London based, with UK actors, but the BBC seem to have shunned it as far as I can see. Then again, Charles Crichton always seems to get a bit of a hard deal from the establishment.


Back to the film. A crazy American journo is lead to believe that the death of his analyst was not suicide. We are lead on a merry path of claim and counter-claim to try and find the supposed killer. All this leads to a wacky last 20 minutes of plot explaining fun.

The B&W cinematography is excellent, with many a jaunty angle creating a feeling of un-ease. The score add to the hairs on the neck standing up. The over-acting by Stephen Boyd is stellar, but just about fits in. The rest is pretty much standard sixties British fare, but overall the film is well worth searching out. I got my DVD from the US.
I am usually pretty good at spotting the killer, but this kept me guessing till very near the end.

To watch out for: when discussing what the third secret is, you can see that the two leads mouth "the fourth secret". Later, when discussing the psychiatrists patients, you can see the leads say sixth, when the soundtrack says "fifth".

What does it all mean?

About 7/10 in all probability

Suzie-Q, this one is definitely for you. I'll stick it on the post if you want it

Not for long....

You know when Gil said he would not be in Varanasi for long? I think he was misleading us. With his super-supplicating wonky beams, I think he is part of a plot to take over the western world.

Either that, or I have been watching too much Jimmy Bond.

No Mrs Dolan, I expect you to reply!

I got your rsponse, but could't reply to you direct.
Start your own blog, then we would be able to expnad our minds with your vast TV knowledge.
I feel an amateur against your mighty fact-store.

Do It!
as Ben Stiller said.

Sugar-coated Chosen survivors

Well, what a week it has been. Or not. I finally got to see the end of Zombie's Halloween and realised that perhaps the doubters had been correct. I previously saw only up until the hillbilly warders decide to show Michael what "Proper" sex is like. I guess that was the good half. The second half played out like a keystone cops version of one of my favourite movies. The only redeeming feature (and it pains me to say this, cos I really don't like the git) is Malcolm McDowell's Dr Loomis. If it was not for him, the second half would be totally forgettable, but he gives us a character we can at least grab hold of.
As for the swimming pool finale. Oh vey, as my Jewish girlfriend of old would say. Or it was shite as my Dad might have said (if he was ever of a mind to comment on a film).
Anyhow, on to Sugar. I think it was pretty good. Trouble is, I never went to film school and I watched it mostly in a window of my PC whilst doing other stuff during my lunchbreak. Some of the stuff on iMDB seems a bit harsh (but it is iMDB!), the student project angle is rammed down our throats, which makes me wonder if it is other film students giving it a hard time.
I liked it. The discombobulation of the main protagonist was pretty well handled I thought. I may be naive, but her visions just seemed like her spirit seeing what er own body had been through. Simple, but I am a scientist, so stick that up your singularity.

As for Chosen Survivors what can I say?

As a child of the seventies (even though I feel a child of the eighties), the movie slotted right in with the Oh My God, we are rogered line of guff. Lots of the familiar faces, lots of the familiar lines. The only McGuffin was the whole vampire bat scenario. What the bezonkers was going on there? The supposed fact that the whole world had been blown up seemed like a fair-enough plot to base a short TV movie on. The has-it-really-happened-and-if-we-open-the-hatch-are-we-doomed plot seemed like a good idea.
Unfortunately, the bloody bats turn up.
Now I know I am a physicist rather than a medic, but I reckon a dozen bat bites would not finish you off. The potential is there for them being crazed, radiation mutated bats, but they just seem to be the normal type.

Aye, but I only did it to get a rise from Gil.

Trouble is, I'm stuck at home with the kids so my mind is mush. I also am not getting the stimulating new environments of Gil. My posts will have to be when and where I can do it. Hopefully I will get better. What do you mean I couldn't get much worse?
Highlight of my weekend was actually making it to the pub, if only briefly. It is amazing to me to see how many more people end up in the pub up the road since the smoking ban was introduced. So much for the doom and gloom merchants.

Perhaps I ought to use this to note my thoughts on the films I watch? Not very interesting to anybody else, but handy for me.

Today was the occasion of my annual lecture to the final year of the chiropractic college. In my usual fashion, I was bricking it come eight o'clock, but a chatty taxi driver on the way there calmed me down. Cor, they can talk. Well most of them anyway. It is a bit less intimidating perhaps to have a chatty one, as the silent ones always fill me with a little dread that they could be Travis Bickle protogees. About a third of the drivers we get now seem to be Polish or Czech and they include doctors, lawyers and policemen. It's a bit of a shame when they can come here and earn more than as a policeman back home.

The class was only about 50 students and a couple of lecturers this year, so I wasn't quite so bad once we had kicked off. I also managed to get the only laugh of the three of us giving a talk. Something about nipples sagging. The lasses in the audience thought it was funny anyhow.

Filmy bit
Managed to watch "Michael Clayton", "Knives of the avenger", "The Hamiltons" and half of Rob Zombie's "Halloween" (the workprint version). I was actually getting into that, given the complete slagging it has got. Also a surprise given my love of the original version (I have the Blu-ray, three DVDs and two VHS copies). As is usual with Mr Zombie, the white trash explosion was much in evidence, along with seemingly superfluous swearing. I liked the kid playing Michael and was amazed at his transformation into a seven foot giant in the second part of the film. I may actually get round to watching the rest sometime, but so far so good.

We were convinced that Tilda Swinton's performance in Michael Clayton wouldn't be winning her an Oscar any time soon (later proved wrong of course). It just seemed a bit one-dimensional considering who was actually acting. I remember the first time I became aware of her whilst watching Orlando years ogo on channel four. I must have been impressed, as I rushed out and bought the book.
I was pleased to see the Coens getting Oscars, but have yet to catch No country for old men mainly due to the lack of distribution out here in the wilds of Dorset. Still, it is out on Blu-ray in three weeks.

It's brotherly war!

Let's see who can write the best/most regularly/most interesting!
Alright, Gil wins on two of the above, but I will try.

Eeek, I'm online!

I blame Kimberley Lindbergs, but here I am. Lets see how it progresses....